the hero everyone said they knew.
April 14, 2008
I was having coffee with an old friend a few weeks ago. I hadn’t seen him for probably 10 years, and then I discovered that he had been working at my company for a couple of years. What a nice surprise!
We talked about the good times, the old memories and the crazy stuff we had done as young men. We were always good kids, and nobody was ever hurt. We used to drive old cars through the bush, like the Dukes of Hazzard, things like that. The beauty of growing up in the country, with good friends.
But this story isn’t about my friend. This story is about his older brother, who was actually my age. My thoughts drifted to his older brother.
I knew this man too, and he was much like my friend in many ways. He was extremely clever, well-mannered and even-tempered, and he would do anything for anybody. He was a quiet fellow, but had a lot to offer if you asked him something. As the saying goes, still waters run deep.
He was also what one would have called a “nerd” back in the day, so of course the “cool kids” would pick at him in high school. But he didn’t care, he just went about his business.
On March 17, 1998, he lost his life trying to rescue his mother in a fire at their house. Tragically, his mother also did not survive. My friend’s brother was posthumously awarded the Star of Courage by the Government of Canada.
It still saddens me to this day, that people would say that they “knew” this man. The ones that seem to say it loudest, are the ones who wouldn’t give him the time of day back when they could have known him. Perhaps they wish they had? Perhaps they feel guilty for the things they said all those years ago?
It doesn’t matter anymore, in any case. This man was a hero.
His name was Henry Shier.
It is funny sometimes how heroes come from the most unlikely places, how people think that a hero has to have a certain look, or be from a certain background. Yet we all have this inside of us. That’s why we should give everyone we meet a fair chance, not just those we deem cool and hip.
This one’s for you, Henry.
I bet Henry would be very happy to be remembered as a hero, even if he probably thought he was just acting as anybody would have. Real heroes don’t think about it twice, they just go for it. They are able to forget about themselves, just to save someone else’s life. That’s what makes them great persons.
May Henry rest in peace.
Hi Joohliah,
That’s just it, real heroes just go for it selflessly. We can learn a lot from these people.
I think he would be happy too. He lives on in our memories, for sure.
He was cut from a different cloth, his whole family in fact. When my mother needed to go to physiotherapy back in the late 80’s and early 90’s, Henry’s mother took her there on a daily basis. She volunteered around the community and was very well liked. She taught her children well.
Brett,
I have met a few of these heroes in my day. Your story just brought a few of them to my mind.
What a man to be proud of, and what a great example. Such a tragedy to have lost them both.
That was a very inspiring story.Thanks.
Wendi Kelly’s last blog post..The Weekend Wrap Up
Wendi,
Thanks for stopping by today. It is a tragedy, and it is our duty to remember people like this, and share their stories with our friends, and our children. These people will live on forever in this way.
Whatever legacy we leave, make sure we make a difference.
My best buddies were always considered “nerdy” – apparently, being good at school or music isn’t “in” these days…
Thanks for the story
I’m glad that this man received such a high honor.
RLD: Taekwondo Happiness’s last blog post..Whoops!
RLD,
I’m glad that you liked the story. You know, it’s kind of funny. I, of course, was also one of the nerdy guys that the “cool kids” liked to razz.
Of course, now I drive a really nice car and some of the “cool kids” pump my gas for me… life’s funny like that…
Beautifully written, Brett.
I want to add something meaningful, but all I’ve got is… this post stopped me giggling (someplace else) and made me think of friends I’ve lost over the years. Fond memories. When time stops like that you remember a person more clearly than you might have otherwise.
Funny, just wrote “still waters run deep” elsewhere then I come and find it here… when I wrote my Tip last Saturday I was in part thinking of your work stories…
I like your geek brain, dude. That’s all there is to it.
Regards,
Kelly
Kelly’s last blog post..Tip of the Week: Want Profits? Don’t Be Cruel
Thank you, Kelly. Well, if you took pause to think about people you’ve cared about in the past, then that has great meaning. Sometimes it is a friend lost forever to the world, sometimes just a friend who drifted from you. I have had both, and often it doesn’t feel like there is much of a difference, that person is just no longer in your life.
Yes, I noticed that over at that other place, and it made me smile. We must be on the same wavelength lately, and that’s great. Your tip reminded me of a few people at work who could try a little harder to be human… dressing down someone is not the way to go, yet it seems to be accepted in some places.
Thanks for stopping in my friend.
-Brett
Brett,
This makes me really sad. It reminds me of a boy my mother said she was not allowed to play with because he came from a “bad” family according to my grandfather. This boy then started to cry when my grandfather said this. This boy was later killed in a car crash when he was only 13.
For some reason, the thought of this boy haunts me.
My grandfather was a cruel person, but everyone said he was wonderful because he put on a good show. Yet he was not a hero, but a coward.
Thanks for these words. They are cutting and real.
Ellen
Ellen Wilson’s last blog post..Ugly Duckling Blogger
Ellen,
It wasn’t easy for me to write this either. I had to stop several times while writing it, because he was a really great guy and so many people didn’t take the time to get to know him. Writing the last line brought a tear to my eye.
Your story made me think too. As our children are growing up and starting to have friends and so forth, we are being careful not to interfere. I can remember my own parents saying “don’t play with so and so” and thinking “why not?” Unless there is some real, serious reason why, we have decided not to interfere. Perhaps we don’t agree with the politics of the other family (for instance), but if their 6-year old wants to play with our 6-year old and is a nice kid, then that’s not up to us. We can’t choose our children’s friends.
If we can learn one thing from stories like this, it is to get to know as many people as you can while you move through life. The garbageman is a person. The guy who runs the variety store is a person. They are good people. And they might be heroes.
(In fact, the owner and operator of the variety store in my town is a retired chemical engineer, who used to be a very powerful executive in South Korea.)
Thanks for taking the time to stop by today.
-Brett
Brett, what a sad story and honorable tribute to your friend. I believe that many of the world’s greatest heroes are those that simply go about their business quietly, helping others without making a big show of it — not to get fame or attention but because they have generous hearts. I wish there was a solution to the problem of bullying and picking on kids in schools. It is very disturbing.
Melissa Donovan’s last blog post..Improve Your Writing: Collect Writing Resources
Melissa, thank you. I agree with you, there are so many people like this. Just doing their thing, helping others as best they can, and sometimes making the ultimate sacrifice to do so. I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but to the extent that I can help out with this, it starts at home by teaching my children the right way to treat others.
Thanks, Brett. People are fascinating. Out of the most humble, unexpected places come the greatest triumphs. While Henry lost his life, his death is far from meaningless as it continues to touch people to this day.
cool dad’s last blog post..Back to basics
@ Melissa – Right on. It goes on through all ranks of society. It is very disturbing.
@cool dad – You’re right. But why do people act like this? Why did Henry have to lose his life to be acknowledged by the Canadian gov that he was a hero? It’s not fair. And because of this badge, people want to jump on the postmortem wagon.
Sorry Brett, I guess you hit one of my sore spots, eh? The mark of a good writer.
Ellen Wilson’s last blog post..Ugly Duckling Blogger
@ cool dad: thank you for stopping in today and for your kind words. You are right, Henry continues to touch people to this day. I was actually talking with his brother this afternoon, just before we left work, and we were reminiscing about some of the fun times we had. We miss him.
@ Ellen, certainly no need to apologize, as this is definitely an important topic. I needed to tell Henry’s story as he was a wonderful human being, and it is a shame that none of you will ever get a chance to meet him, at least in this life. But we can remember people like him, and talk about their stories. I think we need to do that to honour their memories. And it isn’t fair that people have to die before they are recognized as heroes. It doesn’t make sense.